March 2009
Today, at a red light...
…two older men looked at me from the sidewalk. One of them shouted “Michael Phelps” at me. I have no idea what he meant.
Chat With a Stranger! →
randyliedtke:
theidiotking:
less gross than you’d think, more adorable than you’d expect.
This is fun for some reason, not over run by spammers and wierd sex people, atleast not from my experiences. One person claimed to be me in the future and answered 3 questions for me.
You: Hello you’re talking to a bona fide celebrity!
Stranger: Am I
You: yes I am the actress Cameron Diaz
...
Chat With a Stranger! →
less gross than you’d think, more adorable than you’d expect.
One Act Play: The Audition.
Int. Casting Office - Day.
A casting director sits behind a table. Dan, an actor, faces her.
CASTING DIRECTOR: We’re rolling, so start anytime you’re ready.
Dan takes a deep breath and sits down.
DAN: I thought I knew you, Shelly. I thought I knew US. You’ve betrayed me, and I don’t think you’ll ever regain my trust. I mean, we have a family! I am SO hurt by all...
hey, boston college kids
molls:
Remember back in ‘03 when Nappy Roots played the spring concert with J5?
Remember how cool we felt?
Rich white kids in polos totes get it.
Jurassic 5 were created in a lab to entertain white college kids.
evafay:
OMG a vampire calls Dave on the phone!
...
Burning Question #4GX4125V44
I have a job interview today. Should I wear khakis and a blue blazer, jeans and a nice buttoned down shirt, or assless chaps and no shirt?
Akron/Family - Everyone is Guilty
THIS SONG...
Your Clumsy Threesome Propositions.
dealbreaker:
“Hey, you. So, uh, you know that girl from my acting class? Right, right, Lisa. Well, she’s coming over later and like, she’s gonna run lines with me for an hour or two. Is that cool? I mean, it’ll only take a while, and like, she’s gonna bring by a bottle of wine or whatever. You’re totally welcome to have some, I mean. Look, I’m not kicking you out when she comes over. You...
Burning Question #30034634.
Would you rather have a Mini Cooper, or Winnie Cooper?
Sex Proposal: A One Act Play.
Man and Woman sit at a coffee shop.
MAN: I propose we have sex. We are of an appropriate, legal age, and our bodies are sturdy enough to endure the rigors of thrusting. It will be simple and enjoyable. I will kiss you for two minutes to set the mood, and then I will take your pants off. Should you choose to wear a dress, i’ll make short work of removing it, so long as you provide me with...
We Built This City on Rest and Relaxation. →
If this gets enough votes, it becomes a t-shirt. I know I submitted it, but I’d wear it.
Hey Barelysarcasm...
cartoonpenis:
theidiotking:
barelysarcasm:
cartoonpenis:
clarityunfiltered:
Don’t you live in the LA area? Just curious because I’m heading there this weekend, and I’m looking for things to do outside the usual “cruise the mall.”
You mean like have sex with Barelysarcasm? You know, you can do that while cruising the mall. Two birds, one BONE ;-)
That’s what cartoonpenis does… and he...
Hey Barelysarcasm...
barelysarcasm:
cartoonpenis:
clarityunfiltered:
Don’t you live in the LA area? Just curious because I’m heading there this weekend, and I’m looking for things to do outside the usual “cruise the mall.”
You mean like have sex with Barelysarcasm? You know, you can do that while cruising the mall. Two birds, one BONE ;-)
That’s what cartoonpenis does… and he lives here! Boning in the mall...
You're a Cougar.
dealbreaker:
Hey, Mrs. Richardson- okay, Candace, is Mike home? We’re supposed to go to this party together. Oh, he already left? That’s too bad. I guess I’ll just drive myself then…what’s that? No, I don’t want a Mike’s Hard Lemonade, I have to drive, and also I’m 17. Why do you keep winking at me? Are you okay? Is your skin permenently like that? Oh, it’s a spray tan. Cool. Well, I hope you...
Watchamazing.
Dream Cameo 3/13: Morrissey.
Dream: I was in the audience at a magic show (!) and the magician asks for an audience volunteer. Morrissey stands up immediately and approaches the stage. The magician, having instant recognition, says, “thank you, Morrissey.”
