October 2011
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“I like that I’m the only one in the office. I can fart.”
– My brother, on working on a Saturday
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Sonic Youth - New Hampshire
Watchjonahray:
I agree with Jordan. Nick Wiger always amazes me.
jordanmorris:
The Original Monster Mash from John Carpenter (NSFW)
Nick Wiger is one of the funniest. Period. I LOVE how mad he is in this.
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French Kicks - When You Heard You
REBLOG IF YOU LOSE ALL ABILITY TO FOCUS ON WORK FOR THE ENTIRE DAY WHEN SOMEONE BRINGS A DOG TO THE OFFICE. JUST ME? COOL.
Mad Ice Creams
mattjames:
(at the request of Dave Horwitz)
I went to Knott's Scary Farm Tonight
For the uninitiated, it’s a horror/Halloween theme park, and part of the gimmick is that costumed creeps lurk around the park and try to scare you all night. There was a section of it with all Slipknot-ish clowns honking horns and shaking rattles in people’s faces.
One of them walked by me and, without trying to even scare me, just growled the word, “Hipster.”
Touche,...
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Halloween Costumes That Are Guaranteed Winners!
Here are some surefire hit costumes, and all you’ll need to put them together!
Sexy Pumpkin (nude except for pumpkin guts, seeds to cover nipples)
Zombie George Romero (I don’t know, figure it out, nerds)
A cat (cute cat ears, extra long nails, scratch everyone you see until you draw blood)
A Sexy Pink Slip (for ladies. you’ll need a pink slip you’d wear under a dress,...
In Los Feliz This Afternoon.
Dave and Mookie walk down the street. A twentysomething guy with lenseless glasses and both arms full of bags (including a canvas one labeled "Dirt Bag") approaches. He drops his bags and holds out what appears to be an index card.
GUY: Hey, I'm recording an album. It's supposed to sound like Tribe Called Quest and Beck.
MOOKIE: (Keeps walking, ignores index card) That sounds terrible.
Fin.
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Smog - Say Valley Maker
Why do other songs even...
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Last Night
I came home drunk from a bar and wrote a 4 paragraph essay about the importance of drinking water when you come home from a bar drunk. I kept falling asleep at my desk.
I woke up, brushed my teeth, and immediately deleted it.
These are reckless and wild times, my friends.
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The National - Apartment Story
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How Gross Is It, On a Scale Of One To Ten
If I said that I was watching Labyrinth and thought that Jennifer Connelly was cute?
Here are the facts:
I was more noticing that she looks KIND OF the same then as she does now, just younger. It was less a “oh wow that teenage girl is hot” thing.
When that movie came out, I was 3 and she was 16.
She is 40 years old right now.
That scene with terrible green screen and those...
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Sea Wolf - Middle Distance Runner
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Scary Man and Normal Guy: A One Act Play
SCARY MAN: So yeah, I spend most of my time at Baby Meat Locker.
NORMAL GUY: I'm sorry, don't you mean Lady Foot Locker?
SCARY MAN: No, but I've got one of those, too.
Fin.
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Anonymous asked: You just inspired me to be more open and honest with strangers. I hope it doesn't sting.
Anonymous asked: Look, on the internet you play this whole nice guy scheme but I bet you are an asshole just like every other self obsessed "artist". So fuck yourself.
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I got a job
I got the offer one week and one day after getting fired from my last job, and I started today and it’s very fun and I’ve wanted to write about how glad I am and how thankful I am, but everything just comes out sounding like a 4th grade book report. So, for now, let’s just leave it at this, shall we?
Patrick Watson - Man Under The Sea
I am watching Friends With Benefits
It’s just like No Strings Attached except I don’t have to look at Ashton Kutcher’s punchable face.
So, I highly recommend illegally downloading it, converting it in Handbrake, sending it to iTunes, and watching it on Apple TV on a Saturday when you’re somehow hungover even though you didn’t drink the night before.
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Chad VanGaalen - Bones of Man
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Watchmisskatie:
new episode of the Katie Willert Experience!
a cooking show that goes horribly awry… this one made me real nauseated.
(also, i love that people are leaving babel fish translated comments)
“No, no, don’t be scared, old people! We’ve got Whitney! And soon...”
– NBC
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Arrested Shmarrested. Where are the reunions that...
Studio 60 - Give me HALF a season of the actual Studio 60 sketch show with the real sketches (Nicholas Cage Talk Show! Dolphin Girl!) and guests (STING!!!!), and then a 6 hour mini-series about terrorists taking over the studio.
Ned And Stacy - Give me a Haden Church/Messing reunion in the form of a Broadway musical (or give me death).
Outsourced: The College Years - One of the Outsourced guys...
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Born Ruffians -Little Garcon
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WatchThe Story Of: My First Blind Date
Also, I fixed my Vyou and now it works. So.
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Oh, her? She's a walking red flag.
A red flag so big you could use it as a sail.
To get to an island REALLY far away.
With coconuts.
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Step by Step Beard Growing Instructions
1. Notice self in mirror 3 days after last shave.
2. Think, “hey, not bad… I could keep this going.”
3. Day 4, wake up scratching face. Look in mirror. Think, “Ugh, you’re disgusting.”
4. Wait all day, soldiering through. This beard is happening!
5. Shave before bed, feel better.
6. Repeat 1-5 3 days later.
